LEAH SERIES: LORD, WHY?

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Losing a loved one is not a sunday morning crossword puzzle. It is socially, emotionally, psychologically and physically draining. It could trigger depression, psychotic break, post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and physical health challenge in the bereaved if not properly handled. Sometimes, the feeling of emptiness, helplessness, loneliness, pain, bitterness, exasperation and the consequent search for inner strength and stability can be overwhelming.

Job 1: 21 – “…the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD” … A very common phrase used at funerals.

My sweet sister once questioned the validity of reading the above verse of scripture during funeral services and received a very interesting reply which I’m not obliged to share LOL. Well, I’m not trying to be economical with the truth but I’m very much unwilling to start up an online debate on what is considered the core of funeral rituals by many churches. More so, I consider it an offshoot of today’s discuss: Bereavement.

Bereavement is the period of grief and mourning after a death; it is a natural reaction to loss. Here’s a little advice for the discerning: “love the people God gave you because one day, they’ll be gone”.

Today’s post is specially dedicated to those who have experienced a loss and are currently grieving. We’ll like you to know that you are not alone. So, consider this a personal delivery of God’s love, comfort, hope and healing in prints.

LORD, why?” is a victim’s mantra. We are victors not victims. As ridiculous as it sounds, there is a good side to bereavement…it makes us reevaluate what we hold dear.  Although, it’s been said that there is no right or wrong way to grieve but the bible enjoins us to mourn as people with hope; especially when the deceased is a believer – I Thess 4:13. This is because believers don’t die; they only leave their terrestrial bodies and change address to heaven. Mourning with hope means to look on the bright side while mourning. It does not in any way suggest that we suppress our emotions because even Jesus Christ wept over Lazarus – John 11:35. The good thing about mourning with hope is that it creates a positive energy that helps one reconstruct and dissipate negative feelings.  In essence, I’m saying, there is always a bright side to mourning.

For sympathizers/empathizers, you might want to take it down a notch with the psychoanalyzing and the ‘I-know-how-you-feel attitude’ because you really cannot know exactly what or how the bereaved is feeling if you aren’t in their shoes. Dealing with pain associated with the loss of a loved one is very relative because individual threshold for pain varies. It is often wiser to allow the bereaved mourn as deemed fit.

It is a fact that the vacuum created by the demise of a loved one may never be filled; the shared memories are hard to delete and the pain can seem unbearable but I believe God can touch/mend every brokenness and heal every pain. Time heals, true! But Jesus can superimpose the natural process of time-healing and soothe that pain. Supernatural healing is not just available for our sick bodies; it is super-abundantly available for our wounded souls and broken spirits as well. There is also grace for the taking during mourning; grace keeps you on top of the pressure and keeps you going. Need I reiterate that the Comforter lives in you?

Here are a few tips to help you pull through grief: accept the reality of the situation; avoid sights and events that trigger flashbacks; make conscious effort to indulge in happy moments or hobbies; connect socially; eat healthy; sleep and rest well; seek counsel or help; avoid blame games/feelings of guilt and bitterness, indulge in soul lifters like music, meditate on and confess the Word of God, pour out your heart to the Lord in prayer etc.

We hope this article was of help to you. For free counseling, send us an email on: wordloversnetwork@gmail.com. If you need to connect, kindly contact us on: www.facebook.com/wordloversnetwork. Instagram: wordloversnetwork. Twitter handle: @wordlovers1.

Image Credit: http://www.youtube.com

 

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